Frustrations

Life here isn´t hard but it´s also not easy. I´m used to being independent, busy and comfortable. Here life is sloooow, foreign and very much interdependent (mostly me depending on them for EVERYTHING). Just about the only thing I can do here without help is get ready in the morning and use the internet. And since the internet is inconsistent, I´m even more dependent.

I feel like a little kid here and it´s frustrating. They feed me, clear my plate, wash my dishes, take me to work, take me to the country for their meetings and take me home. I don´t know how to make their food or how to speak their language perfectly. Most questions, most conversations and just about every joke has to be repeated for me to understand. What´s more, the people here talk faster than I have ever heard spanish spoken and they drop syllables so ¨esta¨ becomes ¨ta.¨ (now imagine whole conversations like that!")

The Hope interns are reading a book called Compassion, Justice and the Christian Life, by Lupton, which I highly recommend. In one part, it talks about how hard it is to be the recipient and not the giver (especially when it´s more blessed to give than receive - Acts 20:35). I think right now I´m learning to be a receiver, which is ironic considering the poverty here. God´s forcing me to be dependent entirely on Him and on other people. Which is hard, but a big blessing to. I just have to keep reminding myself that ¨For Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.¨ (2 Corinth 12:10)